Pausing to remember.

One year ago today, I felt the love and care of God more tangibly than I ever had before.

I was on Spring Break with two teacher friends in Utah. It was the middle of my first year of teaching in addition to the three of us all navigating teaching in a pandemic, so the break was well-timed and desperately needed.

This particular day was Easter, which we spent in Zion National Park- my favorite national park. It seemed a little poetic to be visiting Zion on Easter; it was a beautiful way to witness the power and might of our resurrected Lord through the majesty of His creation.

We decided to hike up one of the most dangerous passes in the US: Angel's Landing. It was a little difficult at some points, especially when we met people going the opposite way, but overall, it was an adventure and I loved it. We made it to the top, and I marveled at the beauty before me. After taking in the 360 view for several minutes, I reached for my phone to take a couple pictures. At that exact moment, my dad called.

I answered excitedly, amazed that I would have service at this peak and excited to share this moment with my dad. I told him, and while he shared in my excitement, his response was reserved, which is not what I expected.

Then I got confused- my dad doesn't usually call out of the blue, at least not without a text first.

He then told me that my Grandma, who had been struggling with her heart for the past couple of weeks, finally joined her Lord and Savior. She was experiencing the joy of the resurrection in a way I couldn't imagine.

We talked for a minute or two after that, and then, I hung up.

The juxtaposition of the beauty I saw and the loss I felt was heart-wrenching.

I didn't like it.

I wanted to be face to face with Jesus and free from the pain of this earth instead of sitting with all the suffering of this broken world.

It felt unfair.

But.

In a way, I was face to face with Jesus. At least, I was surrounded by His Beauty. His Art. His Creation. It was serving no other function than stirring my delight in that moment. I did not audibly hear His Voice, but I could sense what He wanted me to hear:

"Take heart, mija, I have more in store for you. It will be hard, but it will be so good. Trust me."

I sat at the top for a while, amazed that God would orchestrate all the little things so that I could hear the news of my Grandma's homecoming on Angel's Landing in Zion National Park on Easter morning.

Maybe, just maybe, I really am loved by Him. Not just tolerated, but truly loved...

We made our way back down.

So, on this day, I commemorate the Goodness of God and the memory of my Grandma who spent her life following Him. I learned so much from her and I am excited for the day I get to see them both.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and join me on my journey as the Lord leads me to and through different things.

Today (and for the next month) I specifically ask your prayers and God has lead one of my students under my care while her family is unable to care for her and her host family had to travel to the US for medical reasons. It has been a huge adjustment, not just in laundry amounts, but in my overall energy level and time spent on my knees asking for grace to make wise decisions. No prayer is too short or small, He can use them all!

Thank you in advance for your prayers and support.

Blessings!

-Katie